Thursday, January 7, 2016

What is it? A boy or a girl?

I was coming in out of the cold at the office the other day when I passed in the reception area a coworker who's just became a new dad. He was talking with someone so I didn't stop to chat (also because I'm not friendly) but in my head I said "Hi, new dad!" and then promptly wondered if that would have been weird to say.

Since I didn't say it out loud I didn't worry about it, but I did follow my internal statement with a question "Boy or girl?" because I couldn't remember.

Which got me thinking about how people often ask pregnant women if they know if it's a boy or a girl. Some people don't know and say they don't care "As long as the baby's healthy!". Some people say they hope for one or the other, or maybe they actually know but aren't telling.

Then there are those people who answer the question with a snarky "A human."

I say snarky but in reality no one's ever said that to me before. But then, I'm not sure I've ever asked anyone what sex their baby was going to be because people are weird about that, as if the questioner will judge you for the answer.

The "what are you having?" question is an interesting one to me, because as I thought about it I realized - people don't really give a shit about whether you're having a boy or a girl so stop getting all weird and "I'm having a human" about it.

Then why do people ask? Because IT'S SOMETHING TO ASK!  It's making conversation. It's learning something about you and showing interest in your life.

Same goes with "Do you have a boyfriend?" (YES I DO AND HE'S REALLY CUTE THANKS FOR ASKING!), or asking something like "Will you have kids?" just after you got hitched. While I do think that perhaps it's no one's business (Oh, man, can you imagine the poor person who might ask me that question? "No, I actually can't have kids, thanks for asking!" poor uncomfortable bastard)  I do think it's just another way people make conversation.

I think there are certain situations where when you're talking to someone, what to ask them becomes hard because all you can think about is the pink elephant, or in this example "Are you going to have kids?" if they just got married. So the question is, what other questions do you ask?

You have an acquaintance or coworker who's pregnant and you know this fact. It's the the current hot topic. Do you ignore the boy/girl question and ask "Hey, are you reading any good books lately?"

That's not rhetorical, I'm seriously asking.

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